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Old 05-25-2004, 02:26 PM
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bridges bridges is offline
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Should we "get over" our parents death?

Mary Grace,

Yes, I get this attitude (if not words) from other non-adoptees, too.

Both my adoptive parents have died. No one asked me to "get over" them. And I haven't. Sure the first year was the hardest. They've each been dead over 10 years now and I still have not "gotten over" it nor should I want to.

My b parents "died" (to me) 49 years ago, along with my biological family. Even though they may be physically still alive, the grief is still there. While I have some contact with my b mom's family, the "death" still occurred. I cannot bring that back to life. I can share with her now, but I cannot replace those lost years. I have not met my b father and probably never will. He is as "dead" as my a dad. "Get over it," why should I?

Carolyn Kay
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