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Tbmichals,
After reading your post it sounds like you would be more comfortable with a semi-open adoption rather than an open adoption. But, when you make you match your feelings may change. A birthmother will share with you her thoughts/desires and you will do the same. If everyone is comfortable you will match. If there are questions, then you can see if compromises can be made. I don't think it is selfish for you to want to name your child, but I also do not think it is selfish of a birthmother to desire to be a part of the naming process. After all, she is trusting you to raise her child. If you are set on naming the child, be upfront with the birthmother. Maybe there can be a compromise of you chosing the first name and the birthmother chosing the middle name.
Just my thoughts, Lacy
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