[Wilsonta]

thanks. I will likely postpone the adoption finalization although I did feel pressure by our caseworker to move forward or end it now. I thought that was odd. I mean, building a lifelong family & investing your lives in this takes time to be sure you are making all the right decisions for you & the kids. I also need to find the strength within me to either know I can re-adjust my life goals or send them on their way.

I would say I'm going through the greiving process now with depression, distress, etc. so it's hard to know if I am going in the right direction. I feel we are at a standstill until we get the proper diagnosis. Without that, our thoughts about RAD, etc. don't mean much! And parenting these kids has it's own challenges. Right now, we don't have to proper tools to parent them. I get confused when reading info that says don't get in power stuggles when they are constantly bringing them on. Then, I'm left thinking do I just let them get away with bad behavior because I know where they are trying to take me? It's frustrating. We have finally made sure to keep anger out of it from our side which is helping!

One other question I have - Does anyone have statistics, facts about the recovery rate or if they will ever lead normal lives? Can they develop a conscience where there wasn't one before? Can these kids truly be saved? And what quality of life can they have? Also, has anyone used Biofeedback & did it help? And what can I look for that they are attaching if at all? I need encouragement at this point & maybe some parenting tips because we have one of each type of RAD - anxious (in your face power stuggles) & differential (easier to live with, but deep seeded anger & harder to reach).

I would appreciate any advice! Thanks again!