Quote:
Originally posted by Lorraine123
The foster mom is coming across as selfish. Did she not want to let him go?
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I see it very clearly that the contact with the foster mom is the cause of your son's setbacks. Thats not saying anything negative about the foster mom, just that it caused chaos in his mind.
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I take it you have never been a foster parent. What many folks don't understand is that children adopted from foster care don't fit into any mold of traditional behaviors or reactions. Having contact with former foster parents will not weaken the bond you have with your child, it will strengthen it. There may be some confusion of emotions which is natural. There may some behaviors that puzzle us but that doesn't mean that its unhealthy for the child to have contact with the Fparent.
I believe that many adoptive parents are insecure and therefore want to take away all connections to the past. Even the healthy ones. Its important to put the child's long term emotional health in the forefront. Knowing that not every single connection to the past has been severed will actually make a child more secure not less.
JMHO