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Attachment
We were in somewhat the same predicament as you are. We had our 7th child home for 8 months (March-Nov.) when this mess was found out. We were to finalize in December and the DHS knew of this mess; the adoption agency could have pulled him, but they knew we had removed the problem and were in therapy. We were suddenly faced with the fact that we had another new child and he came home at four years old, just like the other one. Our new son was in several placements in Vietnam before he came home. My wife had gone over to meet him and to submit our paperwork; and then returned two months later to pick hom up. We made an informed decision to adopt our last son; we were not allowed full disclosure on the other one. I feel you did not know everything when you took your two nephews (did you?)....anyway, with this adoption, be very careful you look into the child's background for attachment to a caregiver at a VERY young age. Children who have bonded before can bond again. Our son NEVER attached to anyone, and we did not know this until he came home.....too late. We felt that love would conquer all, WRONG! My words to you, friend, is to be careful.
Our last son was very bonded to the foster family....he was very much prepared to come home to us....he grieved for them, and then he bonded to us. Attachment in a tiny baby can make all the difference in their future. This is just IMHO.
I am so happy for your decision to adopt. Congratulations
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