Brandy...
I am so sorry to hear about the Adoptive Family and that they are having problems. Hopefully they will go and talk to someone. I know that you are close with your daughter's family. That is so great. And I know that you and the adoptive mom are real close. I would just let her know that you will be there for her, just like any other good friend.
I don't have much advice. Just be honest with her when you email her. I think it's great that you will support them either way the situation would turn out.
I would never want to disappoint my kids birthfamilies in any way.. I am fortunate that my hubby and I get along so well and don't fight.. It saddens me when I hear that couples don't try and make the marriage work. Hopefully they will be able to work things out..
They will be in my prayers. Please let us know how the email goes..
Take care.. You are one of the nicest birthmom's that I have met on this site...
Cathy