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Yasta
I have 2 adopted children ( as well as 2 birth children). One of my children was adopted from a relative, one in an open adoption through an agency. My son through a relative has been 10 times more complicated. My best friend also adopted her niece's son. It has also been complicated. My advise would be to really sit down together with birthmother and birthfather and work out exactly how the relationship is going to work. Think of every scenerio possible and discuss it. Then when you agree, write it down, just so you can all refer to it later on. Because no matter how great everything seems now, it may change once that baby is born. My friend and I have both experienced this. Birthparents wanted very limited contact before birth, but had resentment about it after baby was born. Also check out how extended family is going to react. I know mine often feels caught in the middle. My oldest daughter's adoption has been one of the joys of my life, and I am glad I experienced it first. This adoption can work with your cousin, I think it will just take knowledge, patience and faith. I wish you and your baby all the best.
Lisa
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