[ChristiBender]

I think Sonata said it well.

The best thing I can offer is this. Check in with your intentions. If your intentions are to not hurt her overtly and to keep the door open for a potential future (can we ever REALLY know how we will feel down the road) than that is good to note.

Be kind... to yourself (set your boundaries) and to her (be gentle as it seems you are).

Be honest. Tell her at this time you are happy to have had the contact that has transpired and you realize you are important to her. Tell her you are very close to your adoptive family and your nuclear family (husband and two children). Tell her your life is full and she helped to provide you with that by giving you to such wonderful people and by answering some of the questions you had when she located you. Tell her right now you need some time for the people in your immediate life. Let her know that you will be in touch again, but for now you need some space. From what you wrote that all seems to be true. It all seems honest.

I know that these reunions can be emotionally tearing experiences and you were so very fortunate to have had a great, loving and wonderful adoptive family.. your real family. You are also lucky to have been able to get some information about your biological roots. That could be important down the road... you never know. You seem to be a very kind, gentle and honest person. Treat her with the respect she deserves for carrying you and giving you a chance at a good life... but set boundaries that make YOU comfortable.

You are responsible for taking care of you. You know that. Don't feel guilty about it. If you have good intentions, are kind, gentle and honest you can't go far wrong.

hug yourself and maybe say a little prayer of thanks for all the blessings you have had. My best wishes are with you and your father.... give him your time now and you won't regret it. Your heart is telling you that... listen to it.