[Barran]

I am 33, married to a great man, we have no children..I have always thought the reason I don't have children is because I am suppose to or meant to adopt a child. I don't currently feel a void in my life triggering a need for a child (sounds wrong but sometimes people have children for the wrong reason, filling in a void would be a wrong reason to me or having a child to fix a marriage, or thinking it would bring more love to the marriage etc, I am saying those aren't my reasons), but I do however know that my husband and I are very good people and we have a lot love, we are financially sound etc and I feel like we would be great parents, I also feel that it would be selfish of us if we don't look into adopting because we could help a child and make a difference in their life and ours.

I have read some things on the "adoptees" forum and read other things regarding aparents and their issues, I really don't see anything very positive in adopting after reading posts from both areas...the adoptees really never say anything about their adoptive parents, they are all focused on finding their biological parents.
I can understand the need to find the bio parents but how do they truly feel about their adoptive parents, all of them seem obsessed to find their real parents...how odd that must feel for the adoptive parents, how awkward is it for them spend all those hours stressing about if you loved them enough, if you fulfill their pain of being abandoned, the fear of losing them later to their bio parents, all the money invested, all time invested with talking, crying, laughter, to have them search for something you have been to them for all those years.

I think I can't risk myself for this. And some of the stories I have read about open adoption, gosh, doesn't seem right, seems like it would confuse the child even more.

Can anyone say anything to convince me that this is a good idea?