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Definitely involve your daughter from the beginning. I have an 11-year old biological daughter (who also went through the whole infertility scene with us). It was extremely important for her to help paint and decorate her new brother's room. She did, however, want a sister at first; but my husband and I told her that was our decision (as a couple) to make. She helped us name her brother and she even made both trips to Russia with us. After the first trip, I left it up to her to decide if she wanted to take the second trip with us (and, of course, she went - she wouldn't dare be left out of anything). We took her lead during the whole process as to how much she wanted to be involved - kids let you know. We are into our second adoption (in Russia again) and she is planning on taking the first trip with us again. Good luck!
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