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I agree with the other posters. We have all been in this situation one way or another...whether through infertility, divorce, adoption, fostering etc...
I have a good friend who brought this issue up with me a few years ago. She called the dilema "family dating" her issue was that sometimes after searching for new friends, you finally find someone that has kids your kids ages, and seems to also want to meet and bond with others, then you meet the spouse and hate them! or they have much older kids that you don't like, or much younger kids than you are use to... or they parent wayyyyyy differently than you do. .... hence the name "family dating" She commented to me that the really hard part is trying to find friends that you connect with on more than one level.
As your kids grow older, you do get "hooked up" more with school, pta etc... It does take effort though, to make and keep friends.
I thinkthe adoption support group is a great idea, do you have a resolve chapter near you? sometimes they have a handle on these kinds of groups.
Good luck.... and don't worry if you are open, it will happen. Probably when you least expect it.
Good Luck,
Bumpkin
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