[Missy M]

[b][quote]Originally posted by dpen6
Saramurphy,

Just a couple of points I want to make...

I understand you wanting to support shattered dreams. I do to. It is usually ok for the child to stay with bmom IF they truly believe they can do it. It usually is best for baby and mom.

*** Yes ...


But, as an adoptee I DO NOT consider it barbaric for my bmom to realize that she could not parent me and MADE ME AVAILABLE (after 2 years in foster care) for adoption. I take offense to anyone calling them adopters, they are my mom and Dad. There are many bmoms that should not parent or can not parent at the time of birth...in the childs best interest it is also very courageous and mature for the birtmom to realize that.

*** I don't know the specifics of your foster care and your mother. It's possible that she worked very hard to try to make it possible to keep you for two years. Many, many infant adoptions are a permanent solution to a temporary problem, and "temporary" can almost always be read "financial". As I said, I do not know her specifics, but the two-year timeline is intriguing.

*** Please do not misread my use of the term "adopter". It is the legal term and I use it to keep all the characters straight. While they may be your mom and dad, they aren't mine! LOL. It's simply the legal term to identify their role.

*** The pregnant woman may not be making decisions out of courage and maturity, but out of despair and lack of options. There may be other ways to address that than losing one's child forever.

Thanks,
Sara


Last edited by saramurphy on 02-17-2004 at 08:35 PM

Ok I have successfully moved this post and started a new thread unattached from the former posts....MissyM