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Shame
I am also an adoptee in reunion with both bparents. I agree that your husband should not make contact with his siblings without his bmother's blessing. However, I would encourage him to have a very long conversation with her about what it means to him - both being hidden, and not having these relationships. I also would recommend that he read & send her a copy of the article "Shame" from this week's Adoption E-magazine. It is about a bmother in reunion who took that courageous step and what it meant to her afterward. I might also recommend that he give the book "Birth Bond" to her. It says, among other things, that while the birth parents worry about what their grown children will think, do and feel, they are often quite surprised. Most often, the only concern that they have is why they weren't told sooner - something that only gets worse with time.
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