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The only time I would be completely against open adoption is if there was potential for harm to the children. Doesn't sound like that in your case. I hope to adopt, and try to keep an open mind. As such, I realize that in an open adoption, I wuld have to be comfortable shareing my child with his or her birth parents. I might want to set the rules, and even have limited visits for the first few weeks until I have adjusted to the fact that I am the parent to this child. The benefits are wonderful, a second full set of family for the child. The problems that face open adoption are similiar to those faced by children in steep familes: problems agreeing on rules in the household, discipline differences, etc. If your daufghter considers open adoption, if there are not any good books for that, I don't know yet, she might consder reading a book on step-parenting and its problems for the non-custodial parent. The adoptive parents might have the same insecyurities, so if they all read the book, and share feedback, it could really help everyone involved. Good luck. She can stay in contact, and when she is more ready to parent in several years, her young children will have an older sibling to teach them the ropes. How kind you are.
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