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Ahh, guilt -- whether we deserve to feel it or not, it's always lurking there somewhere, isn't it?
I didn't search for my bmom until nearly 10 years after my dad died and my mom was well into dementia, although still living on her own. It's not because I wanted to wait until they were gone -- I wasn't conscious of a desire to know my roots until that point anyway.
But even though my aparents weren't an "issue," I felt some guilt when I started searching anyway. It's like searching for my bmom made it true that my parents weren't "enough" for me. I realized, however, as I met bmom and got to know her that I had nothing to feel guilty about. This is about us, not our parents. It has nothing to do with how badly or well they parented us. It simply is our inborn desire to know our origins. We have nothing to be sorry for in finding it out.
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Maureen
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