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imtimms,
Your relationship with your brother sounds pretty good to me. Probably in an emergency you would each be there for the other, don't you think? You say you don't have common ground, but you grew up together in the same family experiencing the same things (family vacations etc), he is the only one in the world who would really understand your past and vice versa.
Lots of siblings aren't real close. My brother used to make lots of business trips and although he came to my city many times he never bothered to visit me until I complained to my mom who communicated it to him, and after that on one trip he made time to go out to dinner with me. But on the other side of it, I never call him, write to him, or even email him, so the fault is very even between us! Even his kids don't get any presents from me, so your brother is doing lots better than I am in the sibling-relationship department!
But that doesn't mean I don't consider him my brother or that I wouldn't be there for him in an emergency. And in the future we may be closer. My mom and her sister were not close at all during the time I was growing up, but now that they are both in their 70s they talk on the phone a lot and visit each other a couple times a year.
What kind of relationship would you like with your brother? Why do you feel like you get slapped in the face? If it is because the one time he said 'whatever', maybe he was simply uncomfortable with the emotions, some people just aren't real emotional and when faced with a touchy-feely person they can get standoffish. Do you think perhaps you are a touchy feely type and he is a bit of a cold-fish type person? Have you talked to him about the kind of responses you would like to hear and how it makes you feel when he doesn't make loving comments? He might be completely unaware of the way you feel?
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