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Excellent news JL! I hope it all works out. It's kind of funny that this is your second presentation of an Ohio child. We live about 12 miles from Toledo and actually have family in Dayton, yet our worker was not very encouraging about us trying to find an Ohio child.
My piece of advice though is to make sure to take your time with the visits. I know you will want the back and forth to be over and to have your child placed with you (immediately ;-) ) (Especially since the distance will be a long one.) We did too, but now I look back and think that it was a very good thing for us to continue the visitations (longer than I thought necessary at the time.)
Also, don't be completely turned off by just what you read in the files. Our kids look HORRIBLE on paper, but they are just great. I feel alot depends on how the kids have been taken care of since being removed from their first homes. Even our foster worker says that she is always so amazed at how happy our kids are when she sees them compared she expects when she sees their files.
Lastly the files are not the end all, be all. Some have so much inaccurate information, especially if the kids have had multiple caregivers. Our original presentation said that DS had mild Tourette's and never mentioned that DD has it, that DD had nocturnal enuresis. It turned out that DS does not have Tourette's and that DD has a mild case and that DD doesn't wet the bed (at least not since she's been here.) We've been able to take each child off one medication completely.
Grrl...so happy to have you in our posts. Like JL said, these kids want someone for their own. It won't matter that you're not the "sparkly all-American family." (For most of them, if you have a dog you're in like Flynn...hehehe)
I too would keep calling until the "official" signing. It's the squeaky wheel that gets approved. ;-) Also if you don't get into MARE, where are you supposed to find a child between 5 -10?? The biggest thing I think would be to prove that you have a strong support system. You really can't do it on your own without having a way to take a break. These kids are extremely needy and may not give back right away, and without a way for you to recharge it will be extremely difficult. But there are some great kids out there waiting for you. Just educate yourself as much as you can. Show up at all possible training sessions your agency offers, even if you don't need them. Be in front of the agency as much as possible, so you are on their minds. Find the local support group and join it. Ask questions, get involved. Prove to the agency that you are committed and prepared.
When the "state" checked out our placement they almost said no because we are first time parents and our kids have quite the history, but our AW went to bat for us because she knew we worked hard and were very committed. It has worked out wonderfully for us. Even our family therapist is amazed at how well things are going.
If you have any other questions please feel free to ask. When I was first searching this place was a great wealth of information. Good luck and hang in there. It is a long process but so worth the wait!!
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