[lyndalou]

At 19 years of age , I went through my pregnancy & placed my beautiful son for adoption. My Mother was as supportive as she could be , but in 1967 society demanded secrecy & my Dad didn't even know about my pregnancy for many years. Your daughter is so blessed that you are there for her, helping her to weigh her options, caring for her & your future grandchild. I had a closed adoption as that was what was done then. The pain & grief were so hard to handle with no one to talk to. Over the years, the hardest thing to deal with was never knowing if your child was happy, healthy or even alive! I deeply regret never having held him at birth. Luckily, this year, after 36 years ,we were united & continue to develop a relationship that has brought much joy to both of us & our families. Give your daughter the love & support she needs to make it through this difficult time. It seems evident from your post that you are trying to do just that. It is her decision & all of you will have to live with it for many years to come. Seems to me that open adoptions at least give the birthparent the option to see their child & be reassured that all is well.