[JAK]

Originally Posted by CJaneG

I am an adoptee, and my amother was in her early 40s when I was born. I knew from the earliest possible age I was adopted ... chosen ... although at first I didn't understand exactly what that entailed. I didn't need to. As I got a little older, I understood a little more, and so on. It's never too soon to talk about it with adopted children. If you are uncomfortable with the subject, he will be too, and I can promise you we adoptees need, at times, to talk about our origins. Your discomfort will teach him it's not okay to talk about it, to wonder, to need to know. My aparents had no problem with telling people I was adopted if the conversation merited this information. It wasn't offered for no reason, just if a resemblance, or lack thereof, was mentioned, or something that would lead to adoption as a topic. By the time I was 6 or 7 I was telling people myself. It was no big deal to anyone in the family. Nothing to hide, nothing to fear. Just a fact about my beginnings.

As far as I'm concerned, my older parents were just the right age ... and they had another baby, biologically, 14 months after I was born. They were relaxed about themselves and us, wise, patient, content to be our parents with no wish to be our "buddies". It felt right to me.

Jane

Thanks for sharing your perspective and great advice!