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So many takes on this great question. We met out bmom at the beginning of her 5th month and were chosen at her 6th which leaves 4 months of support plus the after birth care. Our atty guidelined our expenses as "anything that would pertain to the health of the baby" ie: maternity clothes, utilities, rent, phone, food (if needed) and other items. It could also include new tires or car upkeep (can't have them stranded) among other things. Could even be a bed if she is required to be on bed rest and sleeps on the floor. It really depends on your atty and the situation. My advice is to talk it over with your atty. Don't let your atty take over your desires and needs. I wanted to handle it on my own so I didn't have to pay the fees of reimbursement of expenses. I simply couldn't afford it. It gets hairy but I've done well so far. However, I can't say I would really recommend it to all aparents. There have also been times when my bmom has tried to get additional money. She had a job and basically quit as soon as we got involved but lives with her parents, a brother, sister and sister in law. We were paying bills on 6 nonworking adults so we had to make adjustments and are not paying all the bills. Each situation is different. Follow your gut and the bottom line, if you feel your trying to influence a decision, you've gone to far.
Also, there is a failed adoption tax credit, make sure you check that out. We've considered backing out several times due to some extreme circumstances and still don't know if ours will fail but we made a commitment so here we are, waiting.
Good luck
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