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update
i had another visit with my b-son since the original post and his a-mom asked him , "how do you feel about a little girl joining the family?"
Maybe i'm just over analyzing but she clearly did not acknowledge it is his sister. So that could lead to some of his confusion. If his parents aren't talking openly with him then it makes all the sense in the world that he is confused.
I know when i raise my daughter she will know she has a brother, and he will be called that. I'm not going to call him a little boy in the family, that's for sure!
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