[sugarandspice697]

Originally Posted by drevans1

1) What ( in your opinion) is a good age to begin the process? If i haven't had children the old fashioned way in the next couple of year should i begin when I'm, 30? 35? i don't want to be an old parent, but at the same time i don't want to give up on my original dream too soon. When do you throw in the towel?

I started TTC (TTC = trying to conceive) when I was 29 years old but I found out along the way I had fertility issues and it took awhile before I got DD. I had just turned 34 when DD was born.

2) From day 1 of first meeting with someone to set up the adoption process, how long would it be until i have a baby? (I KNOW I KNOW it varies)...but is 2 years average? 5 years?

DD was conceived through embryo donation and my wait time was two years and four months. It was 3 years and one month before I finally gave birth to her. Don't let my time line scare you though. If your open to other races, including full CC, then you will be matched much quickly. The whole process could take a year if your serious and flexible.

3)Have you found that domestic or international adoptions are more suitable for single parent adoptions?

I have noticed that most single choose international adoption because there were more open to single moms but now that many countries are closing to international adoption. I now see more singles adopting from foster care or TTC. However, the best route for you depends on what is more important to you. If you want predictability then international adoption may be a better choice because its usually more predictable then domestic. If you want a newborn then domestic adoption would be a better choice because it impossible to adopt a newborn baby abroad. The youngest children are ages 6 months and up at homecoming but the average is 12 months and up.
If your looking to save money than domestic adoption may be a better choice since the cost are much lower than international.

4) Will i be looked at as 'mean' if i say i don't want a disabled child? i may want one some day, I'm a nurse and i feel i could benefit them, but being in my 20s with a first baby, knowing you are going into it as a single parent, i just think having a 'normal' ( not politically correct i know, I'm sorry its AM and i cant think) child would be hard enough! i dont mean for it to sound like i want Baby#1 as a trial baby, but i just dont think i can handle any serious disabilities.

Don't feel bad at all for having a preference. Always remember that nearly everyone said "no" or "will not accept" on their application. We have to draw the line somewhere.

5) is it hard to get a domestic baby? is it easier for international adoption to get a young baby? it doesn't have to be newborn, but somewhere around toddler age or younger i would prefer.

Getting a healthy baby internationally might be tough since many countries that were good options for singles have now changed their rules (like China and some Ethiopia programs) or they have closed entirely to international adoption (like Guatemala and Vietnam). However, since your open to a toddler-aged child. You may have better luck. Off the top of my head, some good programs for you might be Russia, Kazakhstan or Bulgaria. Ethiopia might also be a good option but many agencies are no longer accepting application are they have put limits on single parent adoptions because of the quotas.