Thread: "Is he mixed?"
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Old 07-08-2009, 04:02 PM
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sbaglio sbaglio is offline
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Arrgh!

Okay, I really need to have answers at the ready.

I was at the self-checkout today at the supermarket with our DD in my arms, and 3 of the store clerks (young AA teenage girls) crowded around, saying how beautiful she was and asking her age etc.

One asked, "What is she mixed with?"

Me: "Um...AA and CC" (which is not technically correct - her bfather was from the Caribbean. She caught me off guard!)

Her (with a smile): "And you're the AA part...?"

Me: "Um, well, sort of. She's adopted."

I felt so DUMB afterwards! I know that people assume that she's my biological daughter when we're out. And I am her father. But I'm so used to thinking of her as mixed, that when that girl obviously assumed that I must be one of her biological parents, my mind didn't register quick enough. Because I said what I said, the whole "adoption thing" came out.

I don't mind telling people that she is adopted, but I don't feel like telling people who have no business knowing, like a store clerk I don't even know. Also, as I walked out the store, I felt like I'd put a label on her, like she's "the adopted one", and couldn't just be my daughter. It's her story to tell , not mine as some sort of justification. Argh! .
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