[SingleMama2B]

Hi Becky.... I have completed a search for my daughter's birth family (a year ago). My DD knows that I requested and hired a man to search, but she does not know yet that I have results. Long story short.... some professionals that I have consulted with thought that a search was good, but said to give my DD the information alittle at a time. Sorta spoon feeding. She is home 4 1/2 years, and is 12 1/2 years old. She is emotionally delayed, along with FASE, ADHD and learning disabilities. She is doing sooooo wonderfully, that I am now waiting for her to ask again. No matter what, by the end of summer, I will be giving her the information. She knows that her mother died when she was only 5 months old (alcohol poisoning), and she remembers her father and a very mean and abusive aunt. She worries about her father and grandmother being cold and hungry each winter.

To your question.... I have all ready and waiting, a beautiful scrapbook. The searcher was able to get 2 pictures of her mother, one at about 10 years of age, and the other is her working (union of sorts) picture ID. I have also purchased 2 beautiful matching frames for them. I figure that her scrapbook would hold her Russian family photos and history (as much as they would give up) in the beginning, and then the second section would be her American family and life.

I was conflicted at first when I requested the search, and then again when I saw the actual photos of past and living relatives. BUT, this is her LIFE, and she soooo deserves to know and to be able to see, and she will remember some of it, since she is in some of the pictures from when she was very young!

I plan on embracing what ever she wants to do with the photos and information, though it did take me some time.

Every child and history is different. Only you, the parent knows what is right for your child.

Blessings.................. A in NJ