[ocracoke]

My adoption has nothing to do with money. My birth family was poor. There were 7 years in 10 years. I was the 3rd. They were alcoholics who managed to barely hold it together until my bio dad died. Prior to his death there was neglect and abuse but nothing that was caught by DSS. After his death my bio mom was reported several times before the family was investigated. We were left home alone at night many times. There were several medical emergencies while my bio mom went out drinking. She brought home strange men. She spent the settlement money (from my bio dad's wrong death suit) on a motorcycle for her new boyfriend. And not one person from my extended family (each of parents had 4 siblings and living grandparents) stepped up to offer to assist us when the state stepped in. I was in care for 2 years before being placed and my bio mom did not work her plan at all. And when I found her as an adult she didn't see anything wrong with anything she had done during that process.

My adoptive family struggled financially too. As a child we had a car that if you turned the car off while the windshield wipers were going the horn would honk. We bought furniture at garage sales. We didn't have a TV. What I did have were 2 parents who were present for me. They went out and had a social life but I had a babysitter when they did. There was also food on the table. They spent time with me. I never had to worry about where they were or who to go to. I never doubted their love. Even when my aparents separated and divorced they always made me believe I (and my sister) were their number one priority.

There is a lot that could be done to support the poor and overwhelmed. But I know that my life would have been very different if I had not been adopted. I love my afamily and I am very happy they are my family. And I am very happy that I was moved from my bio family to my afamily.

Samantha