|
I am an adoptive mother. I find it unconscionable what some adoption businesses do.
Rylee, what you have been through is wrong. The fact that other young women may be going through it is wrong.
I am answering you here because I want you to know that there are a lot of adoptive parents out here that agree with you.
I also hope you can channel your intense energy to do something to stop this. Start a grass roots movement to make some positive changes in the adoption process. Maybe there should be laws governing the type of counseling that is offered to expectant moms. Maybe an agency where more than 25% of the emoms place needs an audit. The focus on the agencies should be to help the moms figure out what works for them. If too many of their moms are placing rather than parenting, maybe they need to have their license revoked.
I don't know. I'm making this up as I go along. I just think you would feel better and the adoption world would be more...right...if you did something constructive with your experience.
If someone had told me the only way I could have a baby was to rip the soul out of another woman, I would have said stop the process. I ached so badly for a baby, but I wouldn't put someone else through the pain of placement just to get it. That is one of the many sadnesses an adoptive mother must live with. Her greatest joy came from another woman's greatest sorrow. I come to the birthparent section here to remind myself what my baby's birthmom must be experiencing. (She limits contact with us.)
I often worry about our baby's birthmom. I hope she made the right choice. Given the circumstances, I understand why she placed. Ours was a private placement so there was no agency pushing her. Her decisions was exclusively hers.
I think there are times when adoption is completely right for everyone. Adoption needs to be easily available for these people. It just needs something to prevent all the horrors you've discussed. Is making a change something that could fit into your life right now? Maybe write a letter to your senator. Maybe start a letter writing campaign? There are so many possibilities.
|