[portlowski]

I mentioned in another thread that I was afraid of fireworks as a kid. Well, the truth is that I was scared by all loud noises. I was terrified of cymbals, of all things, because of the loud crash.

Well, I now love in a very ethnically diverse city neighborhood and all of my neighbors set off (illegal) fireworks in the alley. (I hope that doesn't imply anything xenophobic it is just that fireworks seem to be a huge deal in some other cultures) And I am not talking about sparklers...I am talking about fireworks that are fast and furious on the magnitude of a small town fireworks display but they are right outside my window.

I finding myself irrationally angry...like crazy p'eed off and when I walked my dog I was muttering things like, "I hope they blow their fingers off!" I realized that the anger comes from the fear that I still have of very loud and unpredictable noises. My dog is also barking like crazy which is not helping me any. But my 2 and a half year old was laughing as I put him to bed and saying, "firecracker, mommy!" (making it clear he comes from a different gene pool)

I am taking a sleeping pill and hoping to crash til morning!