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I have 1 child and from the moment I knew she was inside me, I was bonded with her. She was the only person I ever held, hugged or cuddled that was my flesh and blood. But alas I was distant in ways also. I think perhaps it was a defense mechanism that was in place because of my own adoption. Why it was there, I don't know, but as she got older and I saw she wasn't going to disappear, or be ripped away from me, those walls came down and we are extremely close. I've always loved her with all my heart, but I do relate to the hazy distant feeling.
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