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You know it is really a shame that this was such a big deal. My original agency is afraid that since the county I live in will not place children with us then other counties would not either. So in her opinion, it would be a fruitless effort to even try for our license again.
She told me to be happy with the three that I have.
It hurts to know that my disciplinary style has changed so much since Jan. 2007. As I said before, I can't remember when the last time was that I paddled one of my children, and the liver thing got old quick. Truthfully, I can't stand the smell of it cooking.
I talked to both my agency and the county; and I suggested creating a plan for disciplining both foster children, and my own that they would approve. The plan could include that the kids placed in my home be 12 years old or over. Kids in that age range will tell in a heart beat if any abuse occurs.
I just want these two kids. I am not sure why I am obsessed with these children, but I can't get over the fact that they are in two different homes... and have recently lost a parent.
One thing that I can point to is that I grew up and passed out of foster care at 18. The only difference between me and the other kids I was living with is that I went to college. But while I was in care, I was placed separately from my sister. So... I can really empathize with this set of children.
I did get advice to try other private agencies, and I still have some really great contacts in DSS... they just picked this week to go on vacation. If all else fails, I have an in with the lieutenant governor. Or, I may try going the attorney route. I have re-read the conditions for foster parenting, and none relate to how you discipline your own children, and I do not have a "substatiated" report with DSS, so that could not legally be held against me.
I did get in touch with my kids elementary counselor, and I got nothing but praises for how well my children have matured in my home. They have surpassed so many obstacles and have matured so much. I have a lot of references that have observed me parenting, and am hoping that I can get this resolved and adopt these children, or at least find out that these specific children find a home together.
Pray for them or me... whichever. And again thanks for not bashing me too much.
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