[stacie25]

My husband and I will be adopting our 19 mo old foster son this year. Our last name is Justice, his middle name is Justus....what are the chances, huh?

Anyway, I would like to change his middle name to Michael. My husband would like to change it to his bio mom's last name (her last name could be a first or middle name). I am not fond of this idea. Naming a child after someone is done to honor that person. Is she worth honoring? She is worth remembering, she gave birth to him, but not worth honoring. And I don't like her last name. My husband wants our son to not feel like we were trying to take something away from him. It's hard on a child grieving the loss of his bio family, and maybe giving him her last name as his middle name would help with that grief. My husband doesn't want it to seem like we were trying to forget her because our foster son will probably not see her again. She has been awol for a while. I guess he just wants to do it as a way to keep both families in our son's life. We don't have any pictures of his mom and no letters. She did give him a toy and we will give it to him when he is older and won't try to flush it, lol, but that is all we have of her.

The more I think about this, the more I come around to liking the idea. Maybe our son would appreciate that. Maybe he wouldn't...she is a druggie who ended up abandoning him.

Just wanted someone else's opinion. Thank you.