Hi
My name is Jen and last summer I brought my then 13 year old son to meet his biological family (adopted).
Anyways, the WORST experience was meeting one of the grandmothers so I thought I would share our thoughts with you so that you can maybe learn a bit from her mistakes. First off ... huge emotional displays were a big no-no for him. Grandma was all about how the "lost baby" was back and how sad she had been and cried buckets. And he totally thought she was NUTS. Also, she hugged him ALOT and long and made him HUGELY uncomfortable. And, she was so wrapped up in HER grief and loss that she spent very little time trying to get to know HIM - who he is, what he likes, where he wants to go in life etc. It was all about her grief and nothing to do with him. Anyways - he wants nothing to do with her now, and has refused all contact since that initial visit. My biggest piece of advice is to remember that although to YOU she is your granddaughter, to HER you are a stranger (one she is probably curious about though
) and relationships take time. I feel so sad that my sons' grandmother couldnt realize that and wasted the time she DID have with my son grieving for all that was lost.