[-maggie]

As I think back to that day in court, I am reminded how much the adoption has changed me. Remembering what my life was like before just makes me so sad for all that I have lost. Not just DD, but myself.

The day I went to the courthouse is a blur. I remember leaving my home and mom asking me where I was going. That was the last time the adoption was mentioned. I don’t remember the ride there and I don’t remember the ride after. I met my caseworker outside the courthouse and we walked up all those stairs making our way inside and sitting in the hall, waiting. I remember that bench well. I felt like I was glued to it. I remember how everyone was so professional and seemed to have absolutely no emotion. It was very hard to get up from that bench when it was time. I don’t remember if they asked me anything and I don’t remember signing.

I really don’t remember much. The stairs and the bench….