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Believe me when I say that this "grandmother" is a twisted piece of work. I have known her for over 25 years. The desire to have her out of our child's life is not a knee jerk reaction. Here are just a few details about her....
1. When she first met our first case worker, she told her all about the numerous times she'd been married and how her third husband beat her up the day before their wedding, so that night when he went to sleep she took a baseball bat and beat him with it and still married the guy! Maybe that's why my niece ( our child's bio mom) has gone from one bad relationship after another. Our child's bio dad was in prison and a member of the Aryian Brotherhood. The guy she was with when CPS stepped in was the one who beat our precious child and the last guy we knew of that she was with was arrested for attempted murder. But this grandmother never has accepted any responsibility for her behavior.
2. When her oldest daughter was young she'd take her bar hopping to meet men. This daughter even told my mother that she knew her mother was the reason that my niece (our child's bio mom) was so messed up.
3. Last year for three months our child refused to go to her house crying and begging me not to make her go, (she was 4 at the time) so I called our caseworker and asked what to do, she told me that I didn't have to make her go, so I didn't, until the grandmother had her lawyer threaten us that if we didn't make her go, he'd arrange it where we'd have to take and drop her off at the sheriff's office. So, CPS made us resume the visits.
4. Our child has told us over the past two years that her grandmother has told her that she didn't have to do anything we told her. We got our chld when she was just 18 months old and after 9-10 months she started referring to us as "mommy & daddy", this grandmother told her over and over that we weren't her mom and dad. Our precious little one was so confused.
5. After one visit late last year our child started having nightmares. When we finally got her to open up and talk to us, she told us that on her visit that her grandmother had left her alone in her car with her 7 year old cousin while she went into a store.
6. Just a few months ago, the grandmother allowed our child to call us while on her visit. Our child started crying and begging us to come and get her. I tried to get the grandmother to let us come and get her, but she refused.
7. My brother who was married to her about 23 years ago for about 2 years was recently diagnosed with colon cancer and had to have most of his colon removed. When she found out he was in the hospital, she went to see him and he said the only reason she came was to find out who the beneficiary of his life insurance was. Which in itself is dispicable, but then she sent my niece (our child's bio mom) to ask him again even though he had already told her that he had no life insurance.
8. Our child was in therapy (something I had to fight CPS for) for the last two years because of all the turmoil this woman caused.
I could go on and on, but call me crazy but I don't my child anywhere near her!
They told us at the adoption that she was ours now just like I had given birth to her (believe me that's something for a 54 yr. old woman to do). But to us, she's always been ours. The fundamental responsibility of a parent is to love and protect their child, but the court has taken that from us.
I may end up in jail, but our child is not going to be subjected to this anymore. Now when she gets older and decides she wants to pursue a relationship with this grandmother, then I will support her, but as for now I'm going to do what I have to to keep her safe physically, mentally and emotionally.
We just want to be a family!
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