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Just a month or so ago, my hispanic son (who is 7)was getting upset with a girl at daycare. She was calling him "chocolate wife". I really feel stupid, because I didn't "get" the fact that she was meaning it in a derogatory manner. She did it one morning when I was dropping my other son off, and my ds was almost in tears, so we brought it to the director's attention. She spoke to the girl, who admitted she meant it as a racial slur. She would have called him "chocolate boy" but changed the second word thinking she might get away with it?! We live in a small town and hadn't encountered any problems yet, so it really bothered me.
My second incident is in my own family(again, just a few weeks ago). My 2 yr old ds is AA. We were sitting at my mom's one Sunday, and my brother-in-law is talking about a can of nuts my dad had, and said, "Give me some of those n****er toes".(referring to Brazilian nuts) My niece and I both lit into him, but he totally didn't get it. Then, a week ago, my sister said the same thing! Then, she tried to defend herself!
I realized with both these incidences, we have a long road ahead of us, and no matter what, we'll never be "safe" from inappropriate comments, even if they were meant innocently. You want to protect your children, and it's a sad commentary on our world that we instead have to educate them how to deal with this, even at young ages.
Michelle
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