Donna
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I think most of us adoptees don't want the tit for tat that goes on we just want to be able to assimmulate where we are and were we belong.
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Totally understandable. I can't imagine being told that I had no right to my history. That would be - to me - like one of those nightmares where you're running to a destination and you can't there. Or where a phone is ringing and you keep tripping and can't reach the handset. Beyond frustrating; only for a lot of us it's just a nightmare. For adoptees it's a reality. And that sucks!
Truly.
All human beings have a right to know themselves. In fact IMO - we have a duty to do so because that's the only way the world's going to change for the better. If I can't face the woman in the mirror, I can't face anything.
And stepping on toes? I've done that in here - just recently actually then I had to do my share of apologizing for my own stupidity.
I - like most other souls here I imagine - am simply trying to communicate and most of the time I fail miserably. Ask my husband - he'll tell you all about it.
Crick
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The only time I typically correct anyone regarding the "real" is if their opinion is "real means blood"
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God love for you this one. You know, I have 1 half-brother, 2 half-sisters, 3 stepbrothers, 1 step-sister and 2 fullblood siblings (hate that term! detest it!).
They're all family to me. I'd cut off my arm to help any one of them if that was what was required. I don't care what their status is. They are loved by me. That's all I need to know.