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I always had a pat answer to questions about my aparents: "My aparents are my real parents, but I have a special place in my heart for my bmom".
Well, for most of my adult life, all I knew of my bmom was a one-paragraph description of her physical features from the adoption agency. I could only imagine who she really was...
In the past 18 months, I have learned my bmom's name and seen her picture; I have held her death certificate and touched her gravestone. I now know the many difficulties in her life and how desperately she wanted to keep me. She is so very REAL. I am who I am because of her.
I love my aparents, but I don't think I would currently be able to refer to them as my real parents again -- "real" is just a word anyway. Sorry if any aparents take offense at that, but this has been an emotionally tumultuous time for me, and I feel like my life as I have always known it has been turned upside down.
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