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I would reach out if you want to. There is no reason upon a first meeting that you need to make it known that you are well off or where you live. It sounds as though this information may come out eventually so you would have to be prepared if that came to be. As for being well off, many people look well off but have borrowed to the max to get what they have so you could come up with some story as to why you are not as well off as it may seem and cannot help them if you decide you do not want to help.
You should not feel obligated to help anyone, family or not. It sounds like they are in some pretty bad situations and unfortunately it may be too late to help-some people cannot change once it has come this far. The best way to help sometimes (I have had to do this with some of my relatives) is to teach them how to help themselves.
Perhaps you could start out with a letter to your bmom and see if she responds and how she feels. I definitely think the safety and serenity of your own family should come first.
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