indiaadoptee or Dpen6 - couple questions
since the issue about '2nd choice' has come up, wondering what you would think about our situation...
long before i was married i wanted to adopt children- i can't really point to a specific time or event that caused that desire, but i remember in college asking my parents if they'd be okay with it if they had grandkids that weren't our race (kinda already feeling out what response i would get). my husband and i met while in high school on a trip to india & nepal through a christian mission organization. we spent 6 weeks there in about 6 cities- by far the most profound and life-changing experience in my life. india has EVER since been alive in our hearts. we have a bio son and intend to have more bio children (no fertility issues), but again, india and adoption are both profoundly still in my heart. i recently read an article on infanticide with indian girls & what an organization (Compassion International) is doing to help, which again sparked this enormous feeling of wanting to do something. again the adoption question popped up in my head.
i know adoption is very complicated emotionally and i don't want to be a pollyanna about it in the least, so that's why i so appreciate having found this site and you guys in particular who are willing to give some reality checks to those of us preparing for this process. my husband and i are very invested in the attachment parenting model of parenting with our bio son and are very interested in reading about how this translates to adoption. also, i am a psychotherapist by trade and deal with lots of trauma issues in my work, so (again don't want to be a pollyanna) i do feel i have the capability to be prepared for these huge challenges that will inherantly be part of any adoption. (all that just for a little background on who we are)
any advice specific to us in our situation? any concerns that are blaringly obvious to you and not me? and if you had been adopted under the above circumstances would you still feel that '2nd choice' feeling, even knowing from us the circumstnaces under which we decided to adopt? any other info is so appreciated too! i hope we can bring this thread back to an informative interaction
