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attachment issues often focus on Mom figure
Sounds more like attachment issues based on the above (that he resents your Mom and now your fiance).
I hope you have a counselor/therapist who is familiar with adoption & attachment related issues - its important if you do not to get him one as soon as possible.
I agree with above posters that you are likely to experience attempts by him to split you & your fiance.
Also, its good to do this (regardless of the impending marriage) for the sake of your mom who may be vulnerable if he escalates to rage at any point. (I'm not saying he will do that, but the expressions of resentment indicate that it has the possibility of occurring as he gets older).
Also, it may be possible that he suffered some type of abuse/trauma/abandonment from a female caregiver in his past? If so, he could intellectually want a mommy, but be currently unable to handle the reality of having one, resulting in the verbalization of the desire but the backtracking once it appears to be happening. Another strong indicator that he needs counseling.
__________________
[/color] Sundara
DH and I Adopted 4 sibs in 2002, they are now:
DD1 / 20yrs 
DD2 / 19 yrs
DS / 17 yrs 
DD3 / 15 yrs
Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?!!
If you ever start feeling like you have the goofiest, craziest, most dysfunctional family in the world, all you have to do is go to a state fair. Because five minutes at the fair, you'll be going, 'you know, we're alright. We are dang near royalty.
Last edited by sundara : 04-21-2009 at 11:26 AM.
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