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Hi Emmacj,
I just read your post and there was a part where you said you didn't answer your birthmom's last letter due to some things going on in your life. I'm wondering if you haven't heard from her because she is waiting for you to make the next move? In the beginning of reunions, there is a lot of second guessing and wondering what the other person is feeling or thinking.
Maybe you could just send your bmom a little letter telling her that there was much going on.
I also agree that strenghthening yourself is very important. That is the #1 most important thing.
I also have a photo of my bmom holding my youngest sister and I've looked at it over and over imagining if that is the way she looked at me. I'll never know for sure as she had passed away before I found her. But from things that my sisters have told me she always thought about me and always loved me.
I've also spoken with numerous bmoms and they have all without exception told me the very same thing. They have always thought of the baby they placed for adoption - no matter the circumstances.
I, too, wish you peace and happiness.
Snuffie
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