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I can see how you are worried... It's a big decision, and at least on my end (We've had our girl home for 10 weeks) it's been rough. We knew what to expect but after visitation from September 2008 to placement February 2009 I was still whiplashed by this girl's anger when we saw it for the very first time the weekend before she moved in. She raged for hours, I had to call her FM to let her know what was going on and that I'd bring her home as soon as it was safe and reasonable to do so.
I don't know what your experiencing in your home with your child but I know that in my house we are still keeping this girl. She is 14, we are her 5th (we were told 3rd) adoptive placement, she has lived in 13 foster homes and 3 group homes (which were explained to us as a place she went only because they had not foster homes available) Cough, cough BS....
Anyway, it's tough... I care about her, I don't feel any sappy love feelings but that's not my personality anyway. I hurt for her suffering and loneliness. If you met my girl you would not believe the words that come out of her mouth in a tantrum... WOW!!!
You can only make your choice based on your feeling but if your kiddo is not hurting anyone, maybe it will turn into love over time. He needs a home and no one can do well in life having been moved multiple times. It's hard to trust anyone after a while...
But do what is best for you and only you know what that is for sure. Sometimes you don't know and that's okay too. How about counseling for yourselves?
IC
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