[DelMarie]

First of all let me say congratulations on your referrals of a girl & Boy. Sorry if this is long winded. I have been a lurker on this board and love to get the chance to talk about our adoption!

Not adopting two children is the one regret that my husband and i have as we agonized over the decision to go for one or two children. We have a little girl who is now 5 years old-adopted from Krasnodar in June 2005.

We recieved her referral when she was 5 months old and due to shut down of the MOE we didn't get to pick her up until she was 16 months old.
She had a VERY SCARY medical report. Her report stated she had low apgar scores of 4-5 at birth, she had cerebal palsy, torticollis, hypotonicity of the lower extremities, and as you stated some other big words that I couldn't make sense of. I have been a nurse for 20 plus years and couldn't even find these types of definitions with my resources at our medical library at my place of employment.
ALL in all though-we fell in love with her photo and we were told to take a day or two to decide. We got a phone call about 2 days later from our case worker who said we could "split the cost" because another family in neighborhing Noverynsk was paying for a american medical doctor to travel from St Petersburg Russia where there was an american clinic. The cost would be 1,000 dollars. we didn't think twice about spending the additional money-we thought it would give us piece of mind.
Our daughter did not have cerebal palsy. She was very low in weight and her head was a bit larger-concern about the head circumfrence but ultimately, she is now a healthy, spunky, 5 year old. I am unsure if she ever did have apgar scores that low or not? Some of the medical terminollogy on her record I felt may definetly have been exagerated but you can never be sure?
We were very scared about what her ultimate "special needs" would be. Her "special need" really turned out to be emotional rather than physical. She was 16 lbs @ 16 months when we picked her up. The doc at the embassy said she was in bad shape and diagnosed her with failure to thrive. She was pale, fragile, anemic, definetly had a flat affect-no smile, no crying, no vocalizing, etc....These were all I am sure from no stimulation in her environment.

Your decision to accept or turn down a referal(s) also is ultimately a leep of faith that God will provide you children who will "eventually" be well in body and spirit. W
e had some difficulties bonding and the first 6 months were hell on me emotionally-even though I thought I was prepared.

She was meant to be ours and I can't imagine life without her! In june she will have been with us 5 years and I don't know where the time has flown. We were married 19 years before she came along so quite a life change for a 40 something couple! Boy-how dull our lives were before.
I guess only you can decide if they are a match for you-sorry I don't have more "sound" advice to offer. If you have the opportunity for an in country evaluation that would definetly be a benefit.

Good luck and blessings in building your family.