Wow, I totally understand what your feelings were and were XX was comng from as fa as being hurt and let down by birthmoms. I was 17 when i placed with a foster couple I ended up staying with. My adoption is open, and they couldn't have kids. They were let down many times from birthmom's. But my adoptive couple NEVER acted out in ways like that. They were more scared that even tho I announced Christmas 2007 I wanted them to be the parents, they didn't want to give their hopes up, so they siad they were happy but we didn't talk too much about the adoption until closer to Easter 2007 (april) and now everything is great
PS
I go to a birth mom support group at LDS Family Services and one of the girls in my group didn't know if she was adopting her baby or keeping it until she was 8 months and now she barely chose a couple and she's due in a few weeks. So there is NEVER a rigt and wrong time for that. It takes careful consideration and thinking.