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I'm afraid if I use the filming and no trespassing route, I'll only make the problem bigger. The boy's mom and I are friends, she frequently keeps my four year old for me, and my four year old and her four year old are each others only playmate besides siblings. I very much want to remain friends, and figure out a way to encourage better behavior out of her older son. On his good days, the kids all play together, and he has the benefit of having fun with a bunch of kids he likes. But at least as often, he just acts like a jerk. One day,as a kindergardner boy got off the bus, he says, "look at that little boy and his color. I can't stand his color. I don't like him". My kindergardner child, who is the SAME color, came in and told me and was all upset. "I guess that means he don't like me and my brothers either!" It can be such totally stupid, random things like that. Often, he'll lurk in the bushes and just watch the kids play outside. They always notice, and ask him why is he spying on them. He'll deny it, and run off. Tell his mother, and she doesn't believe it.
Next month I'll be changing my work shifts so that I'll have more afterschool time with them, and be able to watch more closely, so it's not as much their word against his. I've seen what he does enough to believe my own kids, and his parents believe him. I hate to think I have to call his mom everytime I see him act out. I realize his dad is the biggest problem anyway. Since he works a lot, he's not home when these things are going on, and when he is, he can't deal with extra kids at his house anyway, and keeps his son home. So he never sees him interact with our kids. He's a really nice guy when he's around, but I'm REALLY suspicious he bullies his wife in private and is teaching his son his ways.
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