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The pregnant thing I ignore, I really do. Other people can have children and be happy. It took me awhile to get to that point though. I still have issues with people that are pregnant that I KNOW don't have support, financial means, but I can't do anything about it so I don't let it eat me.
I have a cat, that's how I dealt with the void. Even if I got pregnant again, I can't replace my son, and trying won't help.
I reminded myself constantly that I did what I did for him and that he is well loved. It isn't easy and I still have to do that, but I had to be honest with myself about my situation and the legalities of it.
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First mom to the amazing Kiddo and adopted adult.
1-4-2009 Mom and I visit Kiddo despite the bad weather. He really loved the blue mittens I made him and even helped me plan my living room. Apparently Hot Wheels wallpapper is the way to go.
2-16-2009 I got a promotion, that comes with a raise. Mom and Dad are visiting and we're going to Al's for pie to celebrate.
4-27-2009 Dad surprises me with a Lady Ugly Stick (an awesome fishing rod that is pink) and a 2nd Iowa Light Artillery Battery jacket. I'm a lucky girl!
5-30-2009 Kiddo turns five. It is hard to believe he is that old already, it seems like just yesterday he was being born. I was at peace for the first time on his birthday, what a nice feeling.
6-13&14 2009 A cannon live fire in Casper WY. We got third place and I got to see Devil's Tower for the first time, it was pretty awesome.
7-4-2009 Amelia the kitten comes to live with me and Liz. Talk about jealousy, Liz will adjust though.
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