[hopingforachild]

WOW, thanks for the non-judgmental support!!

My husband wants me to walk away from this site, but I must be a glutton for punishment...

Are you aware you stated 'never, ever, ever' in both your posts? Much like I don't know what it is like to be in your situation, you don't know what it is like to be in mine. It seems obvious to me that there is always more to a situation than what can be conveyed in a post.

I am not some desperate idiot willing to do anything for a baby. I know that a raising a child will be a blessing to my husband and I, but I have a great marriage and we will move on if we are not successful in adoption.

The birthmom volunteered the info that she was not fully truthful so I am considering that positive. I believe she fully intends to place her child at this time. We can't ask for more. I only spoke of the issues to explain why we were being cautious. She is going through an emotional and uncertain situation which may have led to the lies. I hope this is true and that we can develop an honest communication. If so, I will encourage a more open adoption (she only wants pictures) If she continues to struggle with honesty we will likely stick to the semi-open arrangement. (obviously, certain lies would cause us to discontinue the match) I don't think that just because a birthmom or anyone is not taught the value of telling the truth that she doesn't love her child and want them to have a loving adoptive family. Her child certainly deserves a loving family.

I think my biggest mistake was posting on the open adoption page.
I'm sure there are other mistakes. Can't wait for someone to point them out.