[thanksgivingmom]

For what it's worth - I HATED the way we did things through the SW. We're okay now, but I felt like I had to "earn" Dee's respect and trust...and that was a lot of pressure.

I think that sometimes the SW's feed into the birthmom stereotypes with this advice - like we're going to stalk the family or stop by unannounced or try to take back our child. That's not open adoption - that's Lifetime's version of adoption.

I remember not being told what Cupcake's NAME was for the first month or so. Not even last name - her FIRST name - at the SW's suggestion. So I don't necessarily think that everything SW's suggest is gold....

I agree that you can certainly become MORE open as time goes on, and I'm not suggesting that you share everything in the world! But for instance I don't think a cell phone number would be totally irresponsible.

I had literally NO information for the first eleven months and it had a pretty negative affect on me. I felt untrustworthy (which was ridiculous) and like I had something to "prove" before I'd be "worthy" of the info....