[DebbieJFSG]

Today was J's second lesson. Still mostly this is all about what the Bar Mitzvah means, etc. But we've uncovered some really interesting things.

If we were to use the Jewish calendar to figure out his Bar Mitzvah date, we would land on Christmas Day 2010. Clearly that's not an option! It would be impossible to book a place, etc., plus all of our siblings married non-Jews, so even the ones who are raising their kids Jewish have Christmas plans with the non-Jewish grandparents and we wouldn't want to interfere with that. Interestingly, if we did use 12/25/10, the Torah reading for that date is the one with Moses being drawn from the river and "adopted" by the Egyptian princess. Pretty incredible irony...

So we've chosen to move to his birthday weekend in 2011 and found ourselves with another coincidence. The haftorah portion for that date turns out to be the story of Deborah, the judge, and Barak, the general, leading the army into battle. There's no adoption connection, BUT, that was the haftorah portion that I chanted for my Bat Mitzvah more than 30 years ago. Why is that so bizarre? Because my Bat Mitzvah was in June, not January....so the portions don't line up. The reason it's the same is that we used an independent rabbi and did our own service for my Bat Mitzvah, so I chose the portion I wanted to chant, and I picked the story of Deborah because of the name and the fact that she was a strong woman character.

Over the years I've seen many times that there is some sort of serendipity or fate or hand of God (depends on your beliefs...) in the adoption process. We really do end up with the children we were meant to parent.

So what are the odds that I would randomly choose to chant the story of Deborah all those years ago and now, here, today, I find myself parenting a child who will chant the same portion for his Bar Mitzvah?

His reaction to all this? He said maybe he would do the Torah portion and then do the blessings for the haftorah but have me chant it. I'm not sure that's a good idea, although I know it's common these days to have a parent or relative chant a portion... but I feel like this is HIS day, not mine, and I don't want to take away from him.

23 months to decide....