[IanSean]

Well long story short as I can.....

We had a girl in June of 1989, Newly married, in the service (Navy) and due to get out within the year. We mutually agreed to put her up for adoption. Just starting out as we were, things were very difficult, uncertain future, pretty much poor, didn't have a pot to pee in or a window to throw it out of, so to speak.

Knew a fellow serviceman, married for a while, a very stable couple and they could not have kids. One discussion led to another, as events played out they wound up adopting our girl. Pretty much a no contact adoption other than we knew who they were, and I know her name.

Funny how things work out in the long run....we have been married going on 20 years now, a very good marriage, and have 2 more kids since. I always like to think that that moment in our lives and what we did wound up cementing our relationship with a common bond....so here we are 20 years later, commited to each other.

On to my recent conflict with my heart.....every so often over the years I would do an internet search, see where they were living (they did move around 4 or 5times, different states). Just to look, no contact on our part. Pretty much just find an address and leave it at that.

Well I recently did a search, and Whammo! Last year nothing but an address....this year Jackpot! She is 18 now, found a graduation list with her name on it from High School, a graduation list from Air Force Boot Camp, (very proud of that) with a picture, notice in a church circular for prayers for troops overseas with her name, found a myspace and facebook page with pictures, very happy to see pictures of her.

Needless to say I am happy for her, proud at the same time.

Our oldest daughter (15) knows she has a sister, we haven't told her about the recent info we found yet. Especially how easy she could make contact if she wanted to via facebook or myspace.

Though tempted to make contact ourselves, I am emotionally conflicted there also. I am of the school of thought that maybe she isn't ready to yet and leave it at that.

Any advice/comments would be greatlly appreciated.