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I am so very sorry for your loss. My birth mother had also passed away before I found her, it hurts so much, to know you will never get to talk to her, get to know her...it hurts to have your hopes gone.
You do have siblings...siblings to get to know. If they are willing you have a family. Don't allow your grief to stop you from knowing them, that would be a tragic as well.
Talking is good and you will find many on this board that have been where you are now.
Take care,
Dickons
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